You can be suffering through a tragedy right now. Yet, then again, failure and tragedy affects everyone. It might impact us differently, but at the end of the day, it does impact us.
Failure and loss are inevitable, but trying to rationalize them can be the last thing you need to do.
There’s a reason why those things happen to you. Failure and tragedy are by design. They are part of nature’s chisel, chipping away at us in an attempt to improve our lives. However, it doesn’t happen by sitting around and feeling sorry for yourself. You have to turn that mess into a message. You might not realize it today, but there is a grand design.
Yes, everything does happen for a reason in life. Everything. We might not realize it. But it does. However, there are 5 underlying reasons why everything happens for a reason in life. These 5 reasons are fundamental to our greater understanding of the meaning of our lives.
1. It prepares you for what’s to come
One very powerful realization is that everything happens for a reason because it’s preparing you for what’s to come in life. It’s helping to get you ready for a bigger and brighter future. You can’t have the pleasure of success without suffering through the pain of defeat. Even when these are tragedies outside of our control, there is a reason for them.
Cognitively, it doesn’t make sense. We feel like that. You can’t understand the reasons why someone dies, someone leaves you for someone else, or why a business might collapse. All you’re dealing with at the time is pain. But once that pain washes over you, and you move slowly into the future, things begin happening that wouldn’t have happened had you not suffered through that pain in the first place.
2. It makes you more resilient
Failure, tragedy and defeat makes you more resilient. Not at the time when you’re suffering through it. But over time as the weeks, months and years wear on. Often, you will never get over those biggest heartbreaks in life. But that’s okay. Because it shapes you into a more resilient person. It hardens you for what’s to come.
The truth is that tough times never last. But tough people do. And the scars that we receive in life will remind of us where we’ve been, but they don’t necessarily need to dictate where we will go. Don’t wallow too far in misery. Lift yourself up. Find the beauty in the simple things in life because that’s what’s important sometimes.
Ultimately, you understand that not everything is in your control, nor should it be. You simply can’t control everything that happens to you in life. But you can control how you respond.
Life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you react to it.
3. It helps you to shatter your old beliefs
When something bad happens to us, and it’s within our control, as in, the circumstances were a product of our own behavior, it makes a big impact on our ego. In fact, it shatters our old beliefs. We fall from grace and realize that whatever it is that we were doing, however it is that we were behaving, wasn’t at all proper.
You look at things differently. You learn to approach it in another way. That’s the thing about beliefs. They’re ingrained in us from childhood. They’re baked into our minds. And it’s so hard to overcome those old beliefs when we’re stuck in our ways living in mediocrity. We are not talking about tragedies here. It is about failures that we played a role in.
It’s pretty powerful to shatter your old beliefs. It’s essentially your ego crashing down to the floor. We’re able to reason so much of our limiting behavior because it’s steeped in habits. We go after pleasure while trying to avoid pain in the short term. Not in the long term. If we were avoiding pain in the long term we would always do what it took to make big progress and improve over time.
4. It helps invite progress not perfection
It’s all about progress and not perfection. Imagine being able to improve any area of your life by just one percent every day. That one percent compounds on itself over time. But too often, we don’t improve. We actually stay stagnant. That is, until we’re jolted out of our old limiting patterns of behavior by some deep amount of pain or failure. That’s when life’s real lessons kick into high gear.
However, too often, when something goes wrong, we fall of the proverbial wagon. We don’t make a little bit of progress. We actually go backwards. However, when that deep and sudden failure occurs, it opens your eyes to the necessity of making progress.
5. It makes you more empathetic and real
It’s hard to be empathetic when you haven’t really suffered through major defeat and tragedy. It just is. Sure, you can be sympathetic still. But not empathetic. Empathy only happens when you can truly relate through an experience with someone else. There’s real power in that.
It also makes you far more real and far less superficial. It’s easy to be superficial. We all have 3 faces. The face we show the world, the face we show family and friends, and our other face that we show no one. The latter is our true self. What happens when you suffer through a big tragedy is oftentimes those faces merge and you are left with a much more true and real face.
Why is that important? Because authenticity and transparency is so hard to come by these days. But when you find a person who’s real and authentic and transparent, it really does make you stop dead in your tracks. Those are the types of people that should be choosen to surround ourselves with. Not fake people who are only concerned with what others think of them.
So, everything happens for a reason, definitely a good one. It’s difficult to notice when we are in the throes of despair. Sometimes it might even take years before we see the upside to our struggles. Sometimes the tragedy is too personal and earth-shattering to even try to make sense of it.
It seems that too often, people are so afraid of failure that they spend most of their lives running from it, when, in fact, it should be embraced and welcomed. You will never learn from success. You will never improve if you’re always living on easy street. There is true strength and progress to gain just outside of your comfort zone.