Spanking and Harsh Words are Harmful and Don’t Work. Here’s Why:
The AAP emphasizes the need of emphasizing positive behavior instruction over negative behavior correction. According to research, spanking, slapping, and other physical punishments are ineffective at changing a child’s conduct. The same is true if you scold or shout at a youngster. Harsh physical and verbal punishments can harm a child’s long-term physical and mental health in addition to being ineffectual.
- Spanking’s unhealthy cycle. Parents and other adults who care for children are advised not to strike or spank them by the AAP. Spanking frequently makes kids more aggressive and angry intolerant of others instead of teaching responsibility and self-control. In a study of children born in 20 major U.S. cities, it was shown that families who spanked their kids became stuck in a vicious cycle: the more spankings they received, the more they misbehaved later on, which led to more spankings. The repercussions of spanking can extend beyond the parent-child bond. Because it teaches that hurting someone when you’re angry is acceptable—even with somebody you love. When they don’t receive what they want, children who are spanked may be more prone to hit other people.
- Lasting marks. Physical punishment may have additional observable effects on the brain and body and raises the chance of damage, particularly in infants under the age of 18 months. Spanking causes children to have greater amounts of hormones linked to toxic stress. Physical punishment could also have an impact on brain growth. According to one research, children who received frequent spankings had less gray matter, the area of the brain responsible for self-control, and they did worse on IQ tests as children than the control group.
Verbal abuse: How words hurt
It has been shown that yelling at children and using words to inflict emotional suffering or disgrace are ineffectual and detrimental. Even by parents who are usually warm and caring, harsh verbal discipline can cause greater disobedience and mental health issues in kids. According to research, adolescents’ behavior issues and signs of melancholy may increase as a result of the harsh verbal discipline that is increasingly widespread as kids become older.
Learn from Mistakes — Including Your Own
Keep in mind that if you feel out of control as a parent, you may take a time out for yourself. Just make sure your child is secure before giving yourself some time to breathe deeply, unwind, or phone a friend. Go back to your child, cuddle them, and restart when you are feeling better.
Try not to worry if you don’t manage a problem well the first time. Consider what you could have done better and make an effort to implement it the next time. If you believe you made a serious error in judgment in the heat of the moment, wait until you have calmed down before you apologize to your child and explain how you plan to handle the matter going forward. Make careful you honor your commitment. This serves as a fantastic example for your youngster of how to learn from errors.
Path to Well Being
Ignoring inappropriate behavior is the greatest approach to put a halt to it. Over time, this method has proven most effective. You can employ the time-out technique when you want the behavior to end right away.
When a behavior is rewarded, children often repeat it, and when it is disregarded, they stop. It’s critical to be consistent in how you respond to behaviors because confusing your youngster by praising and penalizing the same conduct at various times. You have three options if you believe that your child’s conduct may be a problem:
- Decide that the conduct is acceptable given the child’s age and developmental stage and is thus not an issue.
- Try to put a halt to the conduct by punishing or ignoring it.
- Introduce a new behavior you like, reinforce it by praising your kid, and then repeat it.
And provide unconditional love.
Yes, it should go without saying, but kids need to know you love them every day, even when they’ve messed up.
