How To Make Friends In The Real World

How To Make Friends In The Real World

40. Don’t take a feeling of loneliness as a sign of failure

Loneliness is the signal that you need to reach out to strengthen your social connections, just like hunger is the signal you need to eat. It’s not a sign that you are doing anything wrong.

 41. Be curious

People enjoy talking about themselves.  Ask them questions about themselves and see where the conversation leads.

42. Meet people at a coffee shop

Ask if you can join someone who is sitting alone, and unless they’re working on their laptop, strike up a conversation about the coffee, the ambiance, the weather.

43. Look for places that connect with your interests

Look at the local tennis courts and see if they have clinics or leagues, find book clubs posted at the local bookstore, join a hiking group.  When you meet someone here, you already know you have something in common.

44. Try a new activity

Is there something always wanted to do? Rollerblading, cooking, baking, woodworking, hiking, flying model airplanes, quilting?  All of these activities have interest groups, and they’re probably nearby.

Do an Internet search for interest groups in your desired activity, and join in the fun. You’ll make friends fast because you have something in common with everyone else.

45. Be open

You never know where you will find your next “person”. So don’t close doors without seeing what’s on the other side.

46. Connect on a neighborhood chat site

When you find someone doing something you like on the site, comment on it. Join in neighborhood cleanup days. Bake cookies, take a picture, and say you’ll be in the neighborhood park with them at a certain time and day. Invite other neighbors to bring their own coffee or drinks and join you.

47. Don’t shy away from difficult discussions

Conflict is an inevitable part of friendships, and can actually lead to a deeper friendship because you’ve worked through something difficult.

48. Be patient with yourself

It takes, on average, 140 hours of time spent together to make a “good friend”. Be patient with yourself and make sure to put in the time to develop long-lasting bonds.

49. Volunteer

Love books? Your local library could use your help.  Become a docent at your favorite museum or gallery. If you love kids, volunteer to take them hiking or teach them something. Volunteer at your local nature center. There will be other adults there you can be friends with.

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