FUNNY STATUS
Success is a journey from good to better to best.
Save water, bath together.
Tom should just give up, he is never gonna eat Jerry.
Awwwwww! I know they will copy this status too.
Cute as a button, but not quite as smart.
I used to be cool-headed, look at what global warming did.
Handle every situation like a dog. If you can’t eat it or play with it, just pee on it and walk away.
I’ll stop wearing black when they make a darker color.
Now that’s I have finished up my brain space, who will give me some?
I am looking for my heart, can I check your brassier?
Behind every great woman, is a guy looking at her ass.
Oh, Honey you can’t break a broken heart.
You don’t have to like me; I’m not a Facebook status.
Facebook is the only place where it’s acceptable to talk to a wall.
Her heart was a secret garden and the walls were too high.
Long time ago I used to have a life until someone told me to create a Facebook account.
I’m not shy, I’m holding back my awesomeness so I don’t intimidate you.
Adding you as my friend doesn’t mean I like you, I did it just to increase my friend list.
If you send me a friend request on Facebook and your profile picture is a car, I will assume you’re a transformer.
Facebook is a place where people always think your status is about them.
We never really grow up, we only learn how to act in public.
You think I’m not online. But I’m always here. Even if I’m not posting. I’m here. Scrolling. Judging.
My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch.
Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
I’m not handsome enough to be James Bond. Maybe a villain, though.
Facebook keeps asking me, what’s on my mind? and honestly, it’s always you.
Be a good person, but don’t waste your time to prove it.
Log out from Facebook and go to bed, close your eyes and enjoy my company in dreams or nightmares.
I’m a genius and good person, I just do genius stupid things in a good way!
God made things that have life, rest was made in China.
So grateful for Facebook, otherwise I’d to call 428 people every night to let them know I am ready for bed.
I always learn from other people’s mistake who take my advice.
Today I promise to live without Facebook and Twitter if you promise to kiss me all day and make me feel better.
ATTITUDE STATUS
I’m a warrior, one of a kind…
Sorry, I’m allergic to basic bitches.
When I was born, then the competition started.
Hey you! Now that you have seen my DP, don’t steal it.
Congratulations! My tallest finger wants to give you a standing ovation.
Best friends with the same crazy attitude is awesome.
When you can’t find the sunshine, be the sunshine.
They want to know why I am always happy, these voices in my head are awesome.
Attitude is like underwear, just wear it, not show it.
Feeling like a boss, and staring at the stars, it doesn’t matter the cost, ’cause everybody wants to be famous.
Having a soft heart in a cruel world is courage, not weakness.
I enjoy when people show Attitude to me coz it shows that they need an Attitude to impress me!
You can either take me as I am or watch me as I leave.
I am who I am today because of the choice I made yesterday.
I don’t follow others, I only follow my orders because I am my own boss.
I found your nose. It was all up in my business again. Please keep that thing on a shorter leash.
I never doubt myself, that’s my haters 24/7 job.
My BACK is not a VOICEMAIL, so better say it on my FACE.
Don’t play with me! Because I know I can play better than you.
I enjoy it when people show Attitude to me cause it shows that they need an Attitude to impress me!
Love me for who I am – not what you want me to be. Take me or leave me. It’s that simple.
You can’t expect me to think before I speak. I was born without that ability. So I’m sorry if the truth hurts.
I didn’t grow up feeling very handsome. I learn, I worked and now I’m.
Every hardworking man is the writer of his own success story!
Acting like a human being and serve humanity is my strong personality.
I am, as I am; whether hideous or handsome, depends upon who is made judge.
Having a good personality like mine, I count it’s a blessing and treasure like wine.
What I’m trying to do, creating a unique version of myself.
If people are jealous of you, let them be, you are doing something amazing. That’s the thing!
Sometimes I just want to thank my haters cause they are my unpaid motivators.
The only thing that makes me proud every morning is my personality.
I never try to win over the haters because I’m not a jackass whisperer.
The more I know what I’m doing that gives me the power to build up a unique attitude.
Build your own future by moving on. Letting go annoying things is cool than hanging on.
